Knocking on the Door

To the next trimester that is. Today I am 12w3d! Only a few more days to go to get out of this trimester. In truth though I believe everything is fine.

Yesterday was our NT scan. It went well. Baby's measuring on time it seems (though the u/s tech did not give me a measurement) and the heartbeat was 158- this time though it sounded more like a heartbeat and less like a swishing noise. It was awesome to hear it again. The tech watched our baby for 30 minutes it was great although baby was being pain in the assy and wanted to be lazy. The only time baby moved was when I laughed, other than that it seems baby was content to just lay back and grow without too much movement. I said baby takes after Ray. LOL (he didn't find that as amusing as I did).

Anyway, u/s tech and doc say baby is looking good- the NT was 1.4 (which is apparently normal) with a normal nasal bone (also good) but I won't know the final results of the screening until they get my bloodwork complete- so a few weeks from now. Hopefully before I see the Ob in two weeks.

Mom and I went shopping over the weekend because, although 3/4 of the jeans I own are too big for me (even now) the way they are cut makes the extremely uncomfortable to wear, especially when I am sitting. So I purchased some maternity jeans (SOOO COMFY). I will probably wear them on Friday when we go to Knobel's.

That's another thing. My MIL & FIL expressed concern about me traveling with them on Friday to the park. Apprently they think I am going to be miserable due to the heat and traveling time. That on top of the fact that the following day we were supposed to go a family reunion in South West PA and then travel up to Pittsburgh after the reunion was over. My total in the car for the weekend would be somewhere in the neighborhood of 12 hours spread over 3 days. I was not the least bit concerned. I do well in the car typically, especially if I can sleep. My in-laws know nothing about my car traveling habits really...but anywho we agreed to skip the reunion and just go to Knobel's and Pittsburgh (leaving late Saturday night instead of early Saturday morning for the reunion). Honestly, I think I should be the one to assess my own issues with this pregnancy. I mean I pregnant for goodness sakes not disabled. I can make my own decisions on what is or is not good for me and baby. I just think it's a bit obsessive but I suppose I understand their concern about it.

Anyway, hopefully us saying we are skipping the reunion will be enough for them to "allow" me to go on the trip to Knobels (something I look forward to each year) if not---I guess Ray and I will both be sitting at home doing nothing.

Nuchal Scan and Crazy Dreams

Anyone who knows me knows that I never can remember a single dream I've ever had. But lately (must be something about pregnancy) I've been having some interesting ones. Last nights was by far the most strange.

I dreamed that we had the baby, like yesterday (yeah 11w pregnant I know not possible) and that the baby was perfectly fine, healthy no problem. I remember being in the hospital but not the birth, like I kept saying but I don't remember giving birth to the baby, and my sister and Ray would say "we were there it happened" so I had to believe them. The thing is because the baby was so early we had nothing for her (and it was clearly a girl with black hair [fyi I have light brown hair and Ray is a red-head], blue eyes and somewhat dark skin) and my sister didn't have time to give me a baby shower. Even better is that my Doctor didn't deliver her it was the ONLY male Ob in her whole practice (which is odd since there are like 6 women and only one guy chances are I'll end up with either my Dr or one of the ladies) Isn't that the strangest thing?? I am sure it just means that I am nervous that we won't be ready when the baby comes but it seems so early to start stressing about that...

ANYWAY, on to other stuff. This coming monday is our Nuchal scan. I am not worried about it. I am sure our kiddo is fine and dandy in there. I know this is terrible but the main reason we are doing it is so that I have another picture of the baby and also because I want to see him/her again. I realize it's only been a week (plus) since we saw the baby at the Doc's appt but it's so hard not knowing what's going on in there. Hopefully everything is fine. After seeing and hearing the heartbeat last week I do feel a little bit more confident that things are going to be great and we'll be taking home our kidlet in Feb.

Well, that's all for me, for now.

Swish Swish Swish

That's what the baby's heartbeat sounded like yesterday at the Doctor's appointment.

Obviously, it all went well. Ray and I got the chance to see little Clumpy all movin' and groovin' inside of me. Heartrate was around 150 and you could see little limbs and everything. The baby almost looked human- more so than the previous u/s. The best part was hearing the little heartbeat. The doctor had a bit of time locating it because the baby kept moving around-she would find it and then baby would move and she couldn't find it. But Ray and I both got to hear it and that was the absolute best part!

I also had my annual exam and learned that I have Group Strep B and was put on antibiotics. Good thing too because I noticed today that I have the beginnings of a UTI. So they caught it really early. I have to do the GTT early (around 14 weeks) since I was diagnosed PCOS w/ insulin resistance. They just want to make sure they monitor me more heavily. I appreciate that. I hope I don't end up with gestational diabetes.

I am still feeling sick every once in a while-mostly just tired in the afternoons but it is getting a little better, I guess. The doctor asked me if I was still taking the progestrone suppositories and I told her I stopped at 9 weeks, she said "good because you definitely do not need them" I was like "w00t" in the office.

I have to tell you girls how much I love this doctor. She seems more like a friend than a doctor and I think it's great! I am so happy that she may be delivering our little baby! :)

Our next group of stuff is the Nuchal scan and AFP bloodwork which I have to call Sinai about. Then our next appointment with the Ob is in 4 weeks.

I am noticing my clothing getting tigher (in otherwords they fit now) but no one else can tell but me (good thing). I imagine in about 3 or 4 weeks it will be more obvious but I am not in any rush to let people know what's going on unless they ask directly.

Ok that's all from here. Figured I owed you folks and update!

*Yawn*

What can I say? Nothing, and I do mean nothing, has been going on with me lately. Just the usual tiredness, nausea, sore tatas. What else can I say it's hard waiting for stuff to happen.

I am slowly noticing a change in the way my clothes are fitting. Because I should have gone down to a 12 right at the time I found out I was pregnant all my size 14 are still 'big' just not as big as before. I no longer need to wear a belt with them in other words. I am filling them out. According to my scale I have gained about 2 to 3 lbs-which isn't bad actually. I am trying to keep it less than 170 until the next trimester (right now I am about 167) when I am sure I will gain a whole lot. I really want to keep the weight gain around 25 lbs. It will make it so much easier to lose after our Clumpy is here.

In the mean time I've just been trying to remain positive since the waiting is so hard. We have 5 more days until my first real Ob appointment and then we'll have to schedule the 11w downs scan. I am nervous about that scan, not because I am worried that Clumpy is going to be downs positive but because we haven't seen her/him for a while and I have no idea what's going on in there. I just hope her/his little heart is still beating away in there and all the limbs and brain and all the body parts are growing how they should.

I haven't had any cramping or bleeding incidences and so far I still feel decidely pregnant so---I think we are okay but it's hard not to be nervous about this kind of stuff. I am excited to see my Doctor though and see what she has to say.

That's it from here. I am trying to keep my breakfast down while simultaneous reviewing advertising (oh the fun of it).

A Prayer to St. Gerard

It the past few months my Church going has waned considerably. Actually in the last year we've been really bad about attending Mass. Something always seems to "come up" which is really bad, I know. I always felt happiest at Church though- it gave me a sense of peace maybe. I just knew that God would provide for us there and in the rest of our lives just by taking 1 hour out of each week to give thanks to Him.

Of course, I still feel He provides for us just we spend less time thanking Him than we used to. Not such a great thing.

I don't consider myself a religious zealot or even anything close to that. I barely consider myself religious at all. I grew up in a pretty normal home- we attended Mass every Sunday of course, I was in CCD and did all that stuff but my parents weren't "involved" in the Church and I didn't go to Catholic school or anything. I would say, by and large, we were your typical Catholic family.

In CCD you learn your Sacraments- what they mean, why you do them. You learn about Jesus and Mary etc etc. Same things you would learn in most Christian religious instruction, I would think. The difference is of course the learning about the Saints of the Catholic church. Ann mentioned St. Anthony in one of her most recent blog posts. St Anthony and I have a LONG history. He's helped me find everything from a lost pen to patience. If I could get Ray to agree to it we'd probably name our first son Anthony. LOL

Catholics have Saints for everything- St Jude for hope, St. Lucy for eyes etc. Someone recently mentioned St. Gerard to me. Apparently he's the Patron Saint of Motherhood/the Unborn. I did some research and found a prayer to recite to him. Each morning when I wake up and each night before going to bed I say a prayer to God (of course), Mary and St. Gerard to protect our baby and the give hope and strength to those women who are suffering infertility or difficult pregnancies. I figure a prayer like that couldn't hurt matters any and it brings me hope, I guess.

The basic prayer to St. Gerard is to request his intercession before God and Mary. I rarely say the one I am going to post, my prayers are usually more free-form. :)

Here is a prayer to St. Gerard to all you soon-to-be mothers/want-to-be mothers out there

O Great Saint Gerard, beloved servant of Jesus Christ, perfect imitator of your meek and humble Savior, and devoted Child of the Mother of God: enkindle within my heart one spark of that heavenly fire of charity which glowed in your heart and made you an angel of love. O glorious Saint Gerard, because when falsely accused of crime, you did bear, like your Divine master, without murmur or complaint, the calumnies of wicked men, you have been raised up by God as the Patron and Protector of expectant mothers. Preserve me from danger and from the excessive pains accompanying childbirth, and shield the child which I now carry, that it may see the light of day and receive the lustral waters of baptism through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Long Awaited-Perhaps?

So I really meant to post this whole thing yesterday but as usual I made dinner and fell asleep when I got home. I was lucky I made it to 9pm. The way I've been feeling lately I'm lucky I make it through work.

The u/s went fantastic (I promise a pic as soon as I figure out how to get it here so that you all can see it). Our Clumpy is measuring right on target (6.5mm which makes us 6w4d +/- 2d) with a nice strong heartbeat! We were sooooo happy to see that.

I have officially been released from the RE's care back to my Ob/Gyn whom I need to call. I am just giving the REs office a few days to transfer my medical records back to my Ob's office. I'll call Monday to set up my appointment.

So things are looking great for me, Ray and Clumpy (maybe Thumpy-eh Mel?) and every day I fall more in love with our little bean. Of course I am suffering from m/s and I am tired nearly all the time but I don't think anything in the world could make me happier than being sick for our little one. :)

that's about it. As soon as I get the pic together I'll be sure and post it up.

Status Quo

All is quiet on the home front now. No more spotting and I am not even the slightest bit concerned about it. I put the suppository in last night and everything was fine this morning. I probably just nicked myself when I put it in two nights ago. Everything seems to be fine and the m/s is definitely still around (fun!)

We get to see Clumpy tomorrow and I am so excited. It's going to be too early for a heartbeat but we should see a lot more this time than last time. I am sure it will all be good news for us (well I am hoping it will be at least). I am feeling much more positive lately, trying to remain calm. That's sometimes hard for a person like me.

Either way though I am trying to look towards to brighter parts of this process and not let things freak me out so much. I am not sure how well that will go.

Ray took a half day yesterday to be with me. I mostly just sat on the couch and talked with my mom on the phone. I think she was concerned but not enough to freak out. She never was that kind of mother though. She just told me I'd be fine, not to worry and to do what the nurse asked me to do. She told me I should call Ray's mom to stay with me yesterday but I told her I didn't want to mainly because I didn't want to upset her (obviously I did not have the same issues with my mother). In fact I didn't talk with anyone in Ray's family about yesterday because it isn't something I need to concern them with unless it gets worse or there is a problem. No use making everyone upset, right?

I am predicting a better day today...