To Add Insult to Injury

As if being diagnosed with PCOS wasn't enough now we have MFI (that's male factor infertility) to deal with.

Ray's SA results were very not good. Low count, bad morphology, bad motility (although they were moving in the right direction so that's good). My Ob/Gyn said to get him to a urologist ASAP-so we did. His appointment is on Thursday (of this week). We are praying it was just a bad sample-he was rushed, wasn't feeling well-SOMETHING. Because seriously I can't handle this. And I know it's making him feel terrible. It was bad when we were just dealing with my problems-now we have to deal with his stuff too. Do you think God believes we'll make crappy parents and that's why?

I know he'll be honest with the Doctor but I am afraid he won't be as candid as he could be. This is a sensitive topic for him. I mean I guess I understand no guy wants to be told he can't knock up his wife. I mean that's a blow to a guy's ego like nothing else.

It just figures you know. My test results were good. The doctor told me that fasting blood sugar, free testosterone, LH/FSH levels have normalized but that I should continue on the Metformin and up it to 500 mg 3 times per day (from two times per day). She also said she was happy to hear that my last period was "normal" (i.e. I bled for 6 days not 21) and that I wasn't spotting any more and that even though my blood work is normal she'll still label my condition as PCOS (because she still believes I have that). She told me that I need to come in for a beta hCG on Monday if I don't get my period to rule out a pregnancy, that's if I don't start my period before that (I won't and I won't be pregnant either). When the test comes back BFN I am to start provera to induce my period, then make an appoint to have CD3-5 blood work done and call to schedule my HSG. I am also supposed to start OPKs starting on CD10. Then after she gets my HSG and blood work back I am to come in for the results.

In the meantime Ray will be meeting the urologist and hopefully doing a repeat SA to see if the results are really as bad as they were. If they are I am sure he'll be in for a lot more tests himself. If not then we can talk about the schedule for BD'ing.

So we have a plan and we talked again. We decided definitely no IVF unless it's a "we have no choice" type thing. I am opposed to it morally and financially even though MD will pay for it so I hope we have choices in dealing with this stuff.

It's been a difficult few days and we are trying to find ways to make everything okay. But it's hard.