More of the same here...nothing

CD10 here and I don’t think I’ve seen a temp lower than 97.1 in all the time I was temping when we were trying for Clara. But today it was 96.8. Gah, so the hopefulness I was feeling on CD3 is pretty much gone now. I don’t think I’ll be seeing O for a while, maybe not at all until I get some provera.

I know I shouldn’t be so negative, after all it’s only CD10 but with temps like 96.8 it doesn’t leave me too hopeful. Not to mention I know how this body of mine works (doesn’t work). I’ll be surprised if anything good happens. The best I can do right now is just keep on trucking along and see what happens from here.

The rest of everything is okay. I am experiencing the worst sinus headaches lately. I think it has something to do with all the flowers and trees making an appearance. And even though I love planting and spring, right now the whole blooming world can eat my shorts. I’d like to go one week without a headache. The other thing that’s making the sinus headaches worse is my glasses, I think, are too heavy for my face right now so they are putting pressure on my nose and that doesn’t help too much at all. I am getting new glasses this weekend but it will be at least a month before I see them.

As for Clara, well, sigh. This entire week she’s been hysterical in the mornings. Monday she woke up at 4:30am and refused to go back to sleep until we put on Curious George for her. On Tuesday she slept until 6:15am so all I had time to do was get her dressed (which she was upset about) and do her hair (again another fight). Once she was dressed and hair done she wanted to eat her yogurt but there was no time. I offered her other stuff like a cereal bar, cheese stick, ham, raisin bread etc to no avail. So she fought us until we were in the car and I could distract her with something else.

But yesterday took the cake. After the whole Curious George fiasco on Monday I told Ray that she wasn’t allowed to watch it any more because if she was waking up at 4:30am screaming for it she clearly had a problem with regulating it. We had to take away her pacifier (it was time anyway), potato chips (which she hardly ever got) and lollipops (another treat which was rare) for the same reason. She would finish the few chips I would give her and want more and then scream for 30 minutes after I said no, ditto for the lollipops. So now she doesn’t get those things and she doesn’t get George either because, one episode in the mornings is not enough and she goes completely ballistic if she doesn’t get her way. And maybe other parents think I am just being a big mean Mommy but if you had to listen to a hysterical high-pitched screaming 2 year old in your car for 20minutes at 7am, I think you’d do the same.

Anyway, she was “good” all morning according to Ray and he asked me if she could watch one episode. I caved (like a freaking idiot) and so he put on her episode. Naturally, when it was over and we had to go she went bonkers. She cried for 10 minutes in the house followed by the 20 minute drive to daycare- again throwing off her shoes and socks while in the car (and seriously, I know this is terrible, but had it not been raining I might have made her walk from the car to the school without them that’s how pissed off I was). The when we were in school she continued to cry and cry saying “my George, my George” without stopping, and then after a while she started to say “uppie, uppie” for me to pick her up. I told her I would be happy to do that if she calmed down and stopped crying-which she sort of did. I picked her up gave her a kiss and a hug and told her I had to leave to which, naturally, she started crying again. The teacher told me she would be fine once I left, so did.

Then this morning at 5:45am I could hear her screaming while in my room, which without the monitor, is difficult (i.e. she was loud). I normally wake up around 6:15 so I just sat there trying to get myself together (hoping my headache would go away, yeah right). I could hear her screaming “George, George. I want my George” and, God Bless Ray, he didn’t give in, even though I know he wanted to. She probably was upset for the same amount of time (about 30/40 minutes) but once Ray sat down to get her dress and for me to do her hair (around 6:45am) she was fine and happy. We had no issues in the car and no problems going into school. I think much like the pacifier, she will forget all about wanting to watch Curious George in the mornings and go color or play with her leaptop (a Leapfrog Laptop), something we can bring with us in the car and into school.

That’s all that happened this week. I hope all the Mom’s out there have a wonderful and joyous Mother’s Day. And to those of you still trying for that first little one I wish you the best too.